흰색 죽음 (White Death) | 아버지 (Father)
Never had I heard music that had such an intense emotional impact on me.
Favorite track: 감기
My comments on Bandcamp: I discovered this album during a pretty wicked bout of depression. It was one of the most unsettling things I'd ever heard, and it freaked me out at first. It's since become one of my favorites. The foreboding, dark and oppressive tones are something out of this world, and it portrays the silent and haunting symbolism of death well. Been a Father fan ever since.
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This album.
This album.
I hate to start off with something negative, but it is a huge compliment to the power this album has. When I discovered it, it was bad timing for me, unfortunately, and due to the nature of its somber, droning tones of absolute despair, I became paranoid and intensely afraid. It coaxed out one of my first intense derealization/depersonalization spells, and it started me down a path to discover that I have DPDR. I also learned just how real my PTSD diagnosis was.
And I thank the album for that. It was a wound that had to be ripped open, a door in my cobweb-filled attic of a headspace that had to be thrown wide open for me to realize what was wrong. I had to confront the darker emotions I’d been taught to stuff down for toxic positivity instead.
White Death was an album I couldn’t listen to again for a little while. The first track alone terrified me so much that as soon as I heard the harsh, immediate beginning of the bleak tones, I turned it off. The cover alone was haunting enough to make my breath catch in my throat. Yet, even through the fear, I became obsessed. Never had I heard music that had such an intense emotional impact on me. It sent me down the rabbit hole of the deathdream genre and dark ambient music, and I haven’t popped back up for air since.
In White Death’s first track, you find yourself wandering down a pitch black hallway, but you aren’t quite sure just how small or expansive it is. It’s as if the sound of the void itself is creating that droning, oppressive tone, and in the distance, there is a quiet, patient ticking. A clock, perhaps?
Yes, your clock. A sudden awareness of your mortality overwhelms you, but you remain calm. Unsettled, but otherwise calm.
Whispers fade in, the syllables on the thing’s lips popping occasionally in your ears as it moves around your head. It isn’t a threat, it’s a friendly guide that wants to guide you farther into the dark.
There are more — a few more — whispering over each other. A heavy weight is on your shoulders, but it isn’t material. It’s the weight of depression, of sadness, of grief. You begin to fear you are in a nightmare, or you’re dead and Death is trying to reach you to take you home. You want to turn around, but you can’t now. It’s too late.
Listen to the very last track of this album at night in a dark room if you dare. I’ll leave you with that challenge.
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To read the story behind the album, which I highly recommend if there is one, or to sing up for official merch drops, head to the official Bandcamp page here.